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April 5, 2011


Jose Baez to clear it all up in one minute!

by Andrea O'Connell

What a blessing this is! Today, Jose Baez told the In Session show that when he’s only one minute into his opening statement in the Casey Anthony trial, he will put to rest any suspicion we have regarding her silence during the 31 days Caylee was missing!

I’m so glad he will explain everything!  Aren’t you glad, too?  Wow!

Here we have been wondering lo these last three years why Casey hid for 31 days while her child was “missing” and now Mr. Baez will explain it all to us in just one minute!  This is about the best news I’ve ever heard!

There’s just a little problem with this – opening/closing statements are not considered “evidence.” But, hey, surely Mr. Beaz will clarify everything for us in that one minute!

I’ll let you in on a little secret, too.  The very first day that Mr. Baez and Casey Anthony met, he knew she was innocent, and he knew he could convince a jury of it, too.

Here’s a transcript (below) of the first time that Mr. Baez and Casey met.   Trust me, after reading their conversation, you’ll know the score.  That’s right!  You’ll know what will be revealed in that one minute!

JB:   Hello Casey.  I got word from one of my homies here that you are looking for a badass lawyer?  I’m your guy.

CA:  Yeah?  Okay.  Get me outta here.  This place smells so bad, and the food, O. M. G. is rotten. Oh, man I need some real food.

JB:  (using a blue pen and taking notes on the palm of his hand)  Hm. What’s your favorite food?

CA:  (thinking) I guess pizza.

JB:   Cool. Hmmm.  OK. As soon as I get you outta here cutie pie,  we’re going to the best damn pizza parlor ever!

CA:  Cool!  Okay, let’s go now.

JB:  (expletive) I don’t got keys to your chains.

CA: (expletive) I need these damn chains off me.

JB:  Well, hey, I’ll yank your chains….

CA:  Yeah? Wow.  You move fast.

JB:   Yeah baby.  (Taking notes on the top of his hand now) Before we can get you out cutie pie, we need to get you to a judge to be arranged.

CA:  Arranged?  Arrange me the hell outta here!

JB:  Yeah.  That’s why it’s called an arrangement, see. A judge sees arrested people then he arranges for them to go free.

CA:  Yeah?

JB:  Were you arrested?

CA:  huh?

JB: (louder) Were you arrested?

CA: I’m in jail right?

JB:  Well, that doesn’t mean you’re arrested. But I’ll check to be sure you’re a criminal.  I get criminals out.

CA:  I need out.

JB: Wait a second. Hm. You have chains on. Criminals are the only ones who wear chains, I think, so that means you’re probably a criminally arrested person. Hm. I mean, that would explain the chains they have on you.  Hm.  See, you’re probably arrested since you got those chains on.  (sighs) Wish I could get the key for those chains.  Let me think now.  Hmmmm.  So, here’s how it goes down:  The judge sees you at your arrangement – if you are a criminal and I think because you have chains, so you’re a criminal.  Hm.  Well now, hmmm.  you could have been wearing them for a long time if you didn’t have the key.  You had those things on you for a long time, then?

CA:  Too long.

JB:  Okay! Wow!  I’m good!  Okay.  Uh.  At your arrangement a judge will also arrange for the key to open those nasty chains.  And then what happens is.  Hm.  Let me think now, how does it go?   Hm.  Let me start at the beginning.  Okay. A criminal, see, gets arrested, see,  and the Judge, see, arranges their booty.

CA:  Booty?

JB:  Yeah.  Oh, well, technically the bailer pays the booty.

CA: Cool

JB:  Okay.  We gotta talk money now.  You have any?

CA: (expletive) No.

JB:  That’s okay; we’ll haul in some cash.  (Writing on inner arm now, then says to himself “Get Cash”).

JB:  So how did a gorgeous chick like you, get here?

CA: I lost my daughter for 31 days

JB:  Lost her, huh?

CA:   Yeah.   It sucks.

JB:  I bet.  How old?

CA:  22

JB:  The kid’s 22?

CA:  No. She’s two

JB:  Terrible.  It’s easy to lose them at that age.  They run like hell the minute they learn to walk.    She must be still on the run, huh?

CA:  Yeah.

JB:  Now wait just a second here.  Hold on.  Now just hold on here!  How would anyone expect you to run after your daughter if you’re in chains?  That makes just no sense!   Okay.  All the more reason we gotta get those chains off your cute little footsies.  I’m sure glad you told me this.  So, of course you’re innocent!   (Writes on arm, says to self:  “Hire Gil Cabot to market the innocent angle“)

JB:  Okay. So that’s what happened?  She ran and now she’s lost?

CA:   Yeah, she runs fast.  Thanks for understanding.

JB:   No prob. (Writing on his the hairy part of arm now).  I’m thinking of the trial; I’m thinking…..

CA:  (Expletive) A trial?!

JB:  (Expletive) Yeah, baby!  This is gonna be big!  I’m gonna make you a star.  The story will be headlines all over the country.   Hell!  I’ll get this story out across the world.  Think of it – such drama: Cute young mom chained by…. Uh.  Shoot.  This is an angle we need to cover: Who chained you?

CA:  My folks.

JA: Perfect!  Abusive parents chain daughter so she can’t rescue her child who got away!  Hm.  Are your parents chained, too?

CA:  Yeah. In the brain.  They got a chained brain.

JB:  Good.  They’ll make the perfect pawn for you.

CA:  Cool.

JB: Major cool.

CA:   Whoa.  But I told the cops my nanny took her.  I didnt’ tell them about my chains.  The detectives never even asked me about my chains, that’s how dumb they are.

JB:  (writing notes)  Oh.  Well kill off that Nanny story.  It was weak anyway.

CA:  Hey, you’re about to run outta room to write on your arm.

JB:  That’s okay, legs haven’t been used yet..

JB:  Okay. We need to settle on my opening statement. (Pacing and thinking)  I’ll practice it and you tell me if it works, Kapish?

CA: Kapish.

JB:  Okay. “Ladies and Gentlemen.  I am a Hispanic lawyer.  I am proud to be Hispanic. We are good people, and we …”

CA:  Wait a minute?!!

JB:  Too much of a Hispanic angle? Okay. Here goes.  “Hola, seniors and seniorita’s, me name’ es Jose Baez.”

CA:  You speaking Spanish to them?  You can’t do that.

JB:  No?  Okay.  “Ladies and Gentleman of the Ladies.  I am Hispanic, as you can tell by how handsome I am.  Only someone as handsome as I could have a client as gorgeous as Ms. Anthony.  Look at her.   She’s hot, isn’t she?  I am a lucky man to be representing her.  Now, Ladies and Gentleman of the Ladies of the Jury, you will find my client innocent.  You know why?  You know why?  Huh?  Huh?”

CA:  Can they talk back to you?

JB:  That would be cool.  I think if they like me, they will.  Okay, back to my speech.  “Okay, I’ll tell you why:  My hot client is not innocent because she was…”

CA:  IS!  You mean “IS innocent.”  I’m beginning to think you’re a clown.

JB: Okay.  I got it now.  “My hot client is innocent because when her daughter ran away, my client was in chains and could not go after her!  But, more importantly, good jury, I will show you that the persons responsible for this – although they did not have chains around their feet like my poor client – they had chained brains!  I submit to you, I will PROVE w/out a shadow of a doubt how the chained brains should have protected that child but they didn’t do it!  Why?  Tragically, they were born with brains so chained.  You will find the chained brained ones GUILTY!”

JB:  See!  It will only take me ONE MINUTE to prove you are INNOCENT!

CA:  Cool!!

JB:  (Jumping with joy) Cool beans!!

CA:  (rattling her chains)  Cool rice and beans!!!

JB:  Cool Cuban rice and beans!!!

CA:  You Cuban?

JB:  Yeah.

CA:  Awesome!!!  That is so totally off the wall awesome, man!  O.M. G. this is so great.  My mom is gonna hate you!

(Baez and Casey high-five)

34 Comments Post a comment
  1. Apr 5 2011

    If I hear this as Baez’ opening statement I’ll know where he got it from! LOL

    • CptKD
      Apr 6 2011

      I was thinking the exact same thing as I was reading along, Sherry…

      You are quite the story-teller, my friend!

      BRAVO, once again!
      You have outdone yourself, once more!

  2. Hilde
    Apr 6 2011

    Andrea, oh what an Imagination You have! 😆
    That was great!

  3. jon
    Apr 6 2011

    Great dialogue Andrea! Maybe Jose will just stand up and say “my client is guilty”! Don’t we wish…….

  4. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    Court started this morning, and was basically put in recess immediately due to technical difficulties…

    We are now back, and Dr. Barry Logan is on the stand and currently being questioned by the Defence – Her name escapes me (sorry I’m having a bad morning) but it’s the lady with the wicked hair that is questioning him…

    Will try to get on track here, and understand what’s being discussed – I’m only here for the morning, and POSSIBLY, later this afternoon, so I’ll try to keep you posted on any important, relevant and ‘outrageous’ developments…

    • Apr 6 2011


      and her hair is horrendous

      • CptKD
        Apr 6 2011

        NO kidding –

        It’s still in its usual state of mess, today!

  5. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    Gov & FL Supreme Ct reach agreement. FL Judicial branch given loan to fill shortfall & avoid furloughs. The Governor is approving the remaining funding for the courts.

    CaseyAnthony trial WILL start in May!

    As for the hearing:

    Line of questioning from Sims to Logan centered on “new” tests. Logan says these firsts can be unreliable.

    Sims wants to know from Logan, if the American Academy of Forensic Science recognizes odor analysis.
    Ashton says it’s irrelevant.

    Sims to Logan asking if FBI has standards on odor analysis. Answer was no.

    According to Logan, Furton was not able to find studies or research dealing with decomposition in children.

    Logan looks completely annoyed and disinterested.

    Everyone seems ‘off’ today…

    Another recess called.

    • Apr 6 2011

      Gosh, I just got home – it’s too late to even attempt to listen to the hearings….but I read a few things, and heard what my favorite attorney, Bill Shaeffer said – this is not verbatim, but the essence of what he said: “Today the defense used a sledge hammer to make their point, the Prosecution, a scalpel.”

      LOL! You did such a great job as reporter! 🙂

  6. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    And we’re back –

    Argument centering around peer reviewed journals.
    Do they validate the science?
    Defense expert says NO.
    State’s says yes!

    Ashton says this line of defense questioning has gone “theatrical”!

    Judge Perry says, he’s considering putting time limits on evidence introduction!

    Ashton is now up –

  7. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    My apologies –

    It seems that Simms is still questioning Logan, but Ashton was allowed to clarify something regarding the semantics of science.
    Ashton wants Logan to know why the word “excluded” was used in a report instead of “not found”!

  8. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    Judge Perry just announced –

    He will NOT consider evidence in Frye hearings offered after 5pm today!

    • Apr 6 2011

      That was the best thing he could have done… make ’em get to the darn point!

  9. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    Ashton arguing that no one has testified about level of chloroform in control sample.
    Meaning the defense can’t compare those samples.

    New motions filed today!

    One to remove false filing by Michigan Inmate.
    The other to not let it happen again.

    Only authorized people can now enter docs into court file.

    They have ensured that the Michigan prisoner can’t file court papers any longer.

    Simms asked if Caylee was swimming in Tony Lazzaro pool and swimming shorts were in car trunk, would there be chloroform?
    Ashton objected.

    Simms had wispered to Baez that she would be done soon, however, she seems to be really dragging this out…
    She is rather slow…

    She has now stated she is on her last question, and Logan doesn’t understand what she’s asking regarding lack of Flouride in a child’s remains. She’s inquiring about the difference between adults and children during the decompostitional process.

    Ashton is beginning his cross examination of Dr Logan,
    and on that note, I unfortunately I must be off…

    Apologies, but I have a Dental appointment, and still need to get ready and get going….

    Not sure what time I’ll be back at –
    But I will check in, and see where things are at when I return.

    I dont’ even know if you’re here and watching, or if you’re at work today – Anyways, I hope I’m not gone that long…

    I hate the Dentist – Well, not her…
    but what she DOES! LOL

    I do hope everyone is having a good day…

    Back soon – CptKD

    • Apr 6 2011

      CptKD!!! Thank you so much for your terrific updates! I’m at work- just got out of a very long mtg., and now at lunch. Sounds like it was an interesting day! Thx again, my friend. 🙂

      Sent from my iPhone

      • CptKD
        Apr 6 2011

        You’re very welcome!

        I have no doubt, that you will find much more information out there than what I’ve provided you –

        I realize now, I failed to mention in my above responses some of the outcomes –

        I apologize for that – Sometimes things just move too fast.

        Anyways, I’ll be looking forward to your tonight’s post, and the re-cap that you actually provide!!

        You are way, way better at this, than I am!

        I’m used to writing investigative reports.
        Not so good at the Court Reporter Duties – LOL!


  10. Apr 6 2011

    Cap is good, isn’t she!

    • Apr 6 2011

      She sure does! It satisfies my curiosity as to what’s going on!

      Sent from my iPhone

    • CptKD
      Apr 6 2011

      You are so sweet to me, Kim!
      Thanks for the praises…. I send you a big hug!

      • Apr 6 2011

        Hugs back at ya!!

  11. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    I’m back –

    Closing arguments have begun…

    I missed Baez’s spiel, thank goodness…
    But Ashton is up now –

    Will see what I happens from here, and I will try to find out what happened while I was out –

    Stand by – CptKD

  12. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    Baez presented a Power Point with a slide called “6th amendment issues”

    Baez said:
    “We are again comparing apples to oranges.”

    Baez in closing arguments said to Perry that if he allows air science, he will essentially be writing a check to Dr Vass from ORNL.

    Ashton said:
    The point is that everything Dr. Vass did is generally accepted science,” says Ashton.
    Ashton said that doesn’t mean the conclusion needs to be generally accepted.

    Ashton has finished his closing arguments

    Baez rebuttal:
    Baez is arguing more against the conclusion while Ashton is arguing for the process.

    “To have competing scientific views, you have to have someone that agrees with you,” says Baez.

    “He simply does not know chemistry,” says Baez

    I have to say – No matter what he does or what he says, Baez ALWAYS comes off as a jack-a**!
    He is boring to listen to, and always comes off as a smart alec!He seems to think that since he attended some Forensics Seminar, that he is now well versed in the areas, and art of Forensic Sciences –

    I must absolustely beg to differ – He has no clue as to what he’s doing…

    Now, it’s some sad, sappy story about using this evidence in order to convict someone, and have them lose their life over it!
    Give me a break – She deserves all that is coming to her, Baez!

    Ashton back up – He even, just referred to Baez’s spiel as a “DRAMATIC” argument… And nothing but!

    I can’t help but agree – LOL!

    Perry asking Baez about Case Law, and Baez says he CANNOT find any…
    Baez complaining, and stating that he does not agree with any of the States’s presentation of evidence

    I apologize for not being very specific, but it’s been really hard to hear the hearing today

    HHJP will rule no later, and probably before the 21st of April.

    ‘Heart sticker’, and ‘Stain in the trunk’, are left and remain to be argued.

    Ashton will argue on the ‘Odor in Pontiac Sunfire’, as well, all and any Motions in Limine on will be addressed Friday @ 0900hrs.

    Court is in recess until Friday morning!


  13. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    One more thing about the Power Point Presentation…

    When Ashton got up to do his closing, he made a point of mentioning that this so called “6th Ammendment Issue” has absolutely nothing to do with FRYE, and shouldn’t even be addressed during these proceedings…

    Seems Baez, just won’t play by the rules established by the Court’s, or the Justice himself…

    I hope this JURY sees right through this ‘crooked clown’!!!!

    • Apr 6 2011

      6th Amendment? I wonder what aspect? And yeah, it sure has nothing to do w/ Frye! This is curious indeed! Thanks again! Ps. I may not be able to watch everything tonight….darn!

      Sent from my iPhone

  14. Kitt
    Apr 6 2011

    LOL! Great post! As I was reading it, I began to see the whole thing playing out as a skit on Saturday Night Live!!!! Love it, Andrea!!!

    • Apr 6 2011

      LOL! Thanks Kitt! I love writing little mini plays – and the subject matter is rich with these two!

  15. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    Sorry to hear you wont be able to fully catch up. I know that Simms seems is really slow & takes forever to ask a question. Part of the reason for that, is that she always has to REPHRASE due to Ashton objecting to her questions. Most times than not, she is wrong with her line of questioning or wanders off from Frye. Many times today, Perry had to tell her she was off topic, and going into areas he was NOT expecting to hear about. Anyways, if it can help u, tho its not greatest, use my info.

    • Apr 6 2011

      Thank you so much…. I was going to write something really short… This has been an exhausting day – long meetings, training, then after work, errands and grocery shopping. Literally just got home! Phew! I see that WFTV has 12 parts to the hearing today, and each part is 30 minutes…. Oy vey!

  16. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    Sorry to hear you wont be able to fully catch up. I know that Simms seems really slow & takes forever to ask a question. Part of the reason for that, is that she always has to REPHRASE due to Ashton objecting to her questions. Most times than not, she is wrong with her line of questioning or wanders off from Frye. Many times today, Perry had to tell her she was off topic, and going into areas he was NOT expecting to hear about. Anyways, if it can help u, tho its not greatest, pls use my info.

  17. CptKD
    Apr 6 2011

    Holy bologna. . . I cant believe what I just read. Apparently, at one point this afternoon, while discussions were going on about what Motions were still outstanding – INMATE ANTHONY actually clear as a bell, leaned to Mason and said, “WHAT ABOUT MY HEART-SHAPED STICKER? Now, if thats not an admission of guilt, I dont know what is. The mouthpiece never gave thought to the mic on their table. . . What a pathetic and obnoxious woman!

    • Apr 6 2011

      Supposedly it is in this part of the hearing~

      ~starts at 17:05 but I would back it up a bit to listen for when HHJP says that no more evidence will be heard after 5:00. All I can hear is whispering and I noticed that Mason was not sitting next to Casey but he may have moved when the camera was off of him.

      • Apr 6 2011

        OMG! That is amazing!!! She said “My heart sticker”??? Oh dear God. I have no words for this…

        Sherry – thanks so much for this… I will see if I can find it…. maybe tomorrow! It’s been a Looooonnnnngggggg day! 🙂

  18. As a lawyer in Minneapolis, practicing in consumer and business law, your blog is a value to my legal practice. Thanks for your contribution. I wish you the best with your website!

    Aaron D. Hall
    Twin Cities Law Firm, LLC


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